1794 — Battle of Fallen Timbers
Although the Ewe-Knighted States had won the Revolutionary War, the British and Indians in what was then called “The West” (such as Indiana) didn’t permanently accept the new situation. Often they tried to wrest control back in parts of the Country.
This sometimes led to violent conflict, such as the Battle of Fallen Timbers in 1794. There “Mad” (perhaps angry, but thought to be insane) Anthony Wayne and his Ewe-Knighted States forces defeated the Shawnee and their British supporters.
Scene from the Battle of Fallen Timbers (windfall from a storm provided a measure of cover)
1800 — Territoryhood
Indiana became a Territory in 1800. The map below shows the extent of the Territory, and how it expanded and contracted in the following years:
They don’t make Territorys like they used to
1811 – Battle of Tippecanoe
At the Battle of Tippecanoe in 1811, the belligerents took off after each other on the Wabash River. The urgency to “get at those varmints” coupled with the lack of experience of some of the oarsmen caused many of the canoes to tip over, converting the River into a virtual dunk tank. Or some would say, drunk tank (cider was freely imbibed prior to the attempted hostilities).
After the engagement was over, some wag named the conflict “The Battle of Tippy Canoe” while another suggested “The Battle of Tipsy Canoe.”
To avoid further embarrassment about the slapstick-like performance, it was mutually agreed on (during a clandestine meeting in a smoke-filled field tent) to christen the affair The Battle of Tippecanoe, and claim that “Tippecanoe” was “Injun” for “Me fight bravely!”
In an attempt to “cover their tracks,” so to speak, Bill Hank Harrison commissioned the painting of this preposterous work of fiction:
A painting of canoeists flailing about midstream would not have done, would it?
1813 – Tecumseh Killed at Battle of the Thames
Tecumseh, the grandfather of William Tecumseh Sherman, fell into a very deep sleep while fighting at the Battle of the Thames.
Why does this battle that obviously took place in England appear in this comprehensive tome about Indiana? Following the Fallen Timbers and Tippecanoe business, the locals didn’t want to spill any more blood in Indiana, so they decided to change venues, and stage their next battle in England. So, it was Indianans involved in the battle, but they were playing on neutral turf, rather than in the Hoosier State.
British crayola artist Rudyard Kipper was on the scene, and offered his take on it with this masterpiece:
If you look closely, you can see the dust from Mr. Toad’s automobile in the background (he was racing up to get a look at the Hoosiers and “Savages”)
1816 — Statehood
Indiana became a State in 1816. To commemorate the event, the powers-that-were hired Paul Revere to mint a silver medallion of three baseball players, which he entitled “Wade Loudly and Carry a Big Bat”:
In a fanciful pose, George Herman “Babe” Ruth, Rogers Hornsby, and Will Clark team up to promote baseball. Identifying which one is which is left as an exercise to the reader.
1816 to 1830 — Lincoln in Indiana
The Lincoln family moved from Kentucky to Indiana in 1816, and remained until 1830, when they relocated to Illinois.
They had a son named Abraham, who thus lived in Indiana from the tender-hearted age of seven to the robust and rambunctious age of twenty-one.
Diego Delso makes this statue of Abe available:
Statue of Lincoln situated in Wabash, Indiana
1843 – Wabash and Erie Canal Opens
The Wabash and Erie Canal opened in 1843, cutting through practically the entire State, from the Northeast to the Southwest:
1845 – Johnny Appleseed Dies in Fort Wayne
In 1845, John Chapman (better known as “Johnny Appleseed”) died in Fort Wayne at the age of 70.
“Johnny Appleseed” was a dedicated applevangelist. Another way of putting it is that he was an American pioneer nurseryman who introduced apple trees to large sections of Pennsylvania, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, and Ontario (Canada, not southern California), as well as the northern counties of present-day West Virginia.
Here’s the old boy, wearing his trademark tin cap, about to “take a cutting”:
“Der Apfel fällt nicht weit vom Stamm, oder?”
1861 – Sideburns Designed
Polite (Civil) War officer Ambrose Burnside, who was born in Liberty, Indiana, invented sideburns in 1861:
Combing his hair like a Roman and scratching his left nipple like Napoleon, Burnside added his own touch to his “look and feel” by cultivating fluffy side-whiskers
1862 – Gatling Gun Invented
In 1862, Richard Gatling, of Indianapolis, invented the rapid-fire machine gun, commonly known as the “Gatling Gun,” because it “gattled” as it worked (instead of whistling). That is to say, the noise it made sounded like “gattle, gattle, gattle” to some ears.
This marvel of multiplied mayhem was invented just in time for the Polite (Civil) War!
Some of the newly minted operators of the contraption appear a little dubious about it all:
“I wonder if they’re going to provide ear protection for us? I can’t stand that infernal gattle-gattle-gattle racket!”
1866 — First Train Robbery in the Ewe-Knighted States
The first train robbery in the Ewe-Knighted States was carried out near Seymour (home of John Mellencamp, but don’t make any allusions or assumptions about any possible connection between the robbers and the smooth pop troubadour).
This operation was overseen by The Reno Gang, the first outlaw gang in the Country.
1867 — John Muir Traverses Indiana
Inventor, Naturalist, Serial Hiker, and Author John Muir hoofed it from Indiana to the Gulf of Mexico in 1867, walking through Kentucky on his way to Florida.
In 1916, Muir wrote a book about that experience entitled, “A Thousand-Mile Walk to the Gulf.”
The map below shows the route he took:
If you can get your hands on a thermonuclear ionized microscope with Doppler capability, you can see John trudging across the tundra, mile after mile. Well, it’s not exactly tundra, but “tundra” sounds better than “dirt.”
1871 – First Major League Game
The first Major League Baseball game ever played took place in Fort Wayne in 1871. This historic contest pitted the Cleveland Forest Cities against the Fort Wayne Kekiongas on May 4th.
For those wondering (if you’re not wondering, skip this paragraph), “Kekiongas” is gas that is extracted from Kekions. Kekions are a rare type of furless mammal found only in remote regions of Indiana, such as Fort Wayne.
1880 — “Ben-Hymn”
Brookville’s Lew Wallace had his novel “Ben-Hymn” published in 1880.
The very next year (as a babe-in-arms), Charlton Heston read it, and boldly proclaimed that he wanted to play the role of The Omega Man when the book was flickified.
Here is the author and his brainchild:
Lew Wallace in his Polite (Civil) War duds and his book
1885 -- “Little Orphant Annie”
James Combover Riley was known as “The Hoosier Poet.” Officially the Poet Lariat of Indiana, Riley was born in Greenfield in 1849. Probably his most famous work was “Little Orphant Annie,” which was first published in 1885.
The titular character was based on an orphan girl Riley’s family took in, whose name was actually Mary Alice “Allie” Smith. Riley’s original title for the poem was “The Elf Child,” but even after he later tried to change it to “Little Orphant Allie,” the typesetter goofed up and changed “Allie” to “Annie” – and it has been called that ever since.
This character (Little Orphan Annie), has since been the inspiration for comic strips, plays, radio programs, television shows, and movies.
The fictional and the real “Little Orphan Annie” are shown below, side-by-side:
Drawing on left by True Williams, frequent collaborator with Mark Twain. The real girl (“Allie”) is on the right.
. . .
Each Saturday and Tuesday an excerpt of one State’s (satirized) history will be posted here, in alphabetical order (from Alabama to Wyoming).
The (32-page) complete book “The New All-too-True-Blue History of Indiana” is available here.
The regions of the U.S. have been combined into volumes, too; Indiana is included in the volume The New All-too-True-Blue History of the American Midwest
You can listen to this excerpt here:
Blackbird Crow Raven is also the author of the book “the Zany Time Travels of Warble McGorkle”