Serialization of "Quedly Dake and His Quest to Conquer the Globe" — Chapter 23 of 25
From Book 3 of the “Taterskin & The Eco Defenders” Trilogy
Quedly Dake was angry, frustrated, fearful, embarrassed, and beginning to feel claustrophobic, ensconced as he was in the stuffy environs of Albert’s flannel shirt pocket.
“Hey, lemme outta here!” he yelled.
Albert ignored him. For one thing, he couldn’t quite tell what he was saying, what with Dake’s voice being so weak and the pitch of it so high—due to the tiny size Dake had been shrunk to, you see. For another reason, there was nothing Dake could say that would change anything or that Albert needed to know—or even was much interested in, for that matter.
Losing his patience and his temper, Dake pinched Albert as hard as he could, angling to at least get a response for his efforts.
“Hey, cut that out!” Albert said. “Stop tickling me.”
Dake lost his cool then—“big time,” as they say. He lashed out by kicking and punching Albert as hard as he could in the chest. Dake’s ministrations still didn’t hurt Albert much, but enough for him to retaliate by lightly slapping at the manic figure in his pocket. To Albert, it was a very mild tap that he had administered, but Dake’s perspective differed: it felt to him as if he’d been hit in the head with a waffle iron or a rolling pin.
Dake was about to lodge a protest about this rough treatment, but instead he passed out, slumping into a heap at the bottom of Albert’s shirt pocket.
“That’s more like it,” Albert said, “He finally got tired of whining and decided to take a nap.”
“Who?” I asked.
“Dake. He was tickling me and wouldn’t stop. I gave him a tap and he gave up his foolishness and decided to take a nappy-noo.”
For my part, I hoped Albert hadn’t killed Dake. I knew that Albert would feel bad about it if he had, and certainly wouldn’t have done such a thing on purpose—not even to someone as evil and twisted as Quedly Dake.
But it did make me wonder: What would a ‘tap’ from Albert feel like to Dake, when Albert was thousands of times bigger and heavier than him? I imagined it would be like Tubthumper or Chumbawumba at their full size stroking someone with their tusks, or Ocero Puddleby lightly poking somebody with his horn, or Jowls Behemoth accidentally stepping on someone’s foot.
Fortunately, my fears were unfounded. Just when the Wet Tortugas came in sight in the distance (after flying for what seemed like eons over the South Atlantic Ocean), Dake stirred awake and began asking for grog, and claiming to have been forced to drink bilge water.
Apparently Dake had had a nightmare or something. That knock on the head (or ‘love tap,’ as Albert put it), had knocked the sense out of him and the silliness into him.
Albert didn’t answer Dake, because 1) He was tired of hearing him complaining all the time, and 2) They would be at a source of fresh water presently. Dake could wait, hopefully in silence.
The Arodnap and the Androcles simultaneously landed on the southeast beach of The Wet Tortugas. Albert and Ravelle shut the engines off. Ooga leaped out of the Androcles and approached Albert.
“Hey, old buddy old pal, can I fly the Arodnap on the way home?” Ooga asked, clasping his hands in front of him and giving Albert his best soulful and appealing look (or so he thought, anyway).
“Why not?” Albert replied nonchalantly.
“There’s no reason why not!” Ooga said, a little perplexed. He was ready to rebut any reason that might be proposed.
“Then yes,” Albert said.
Ooga was still a little confused by the mini-conversation, but was glad that he could fly the Arodnap back to Zenia when they were ready to return to their accustomed time and place.
The previous chapter can be found here.
The next chapter can be found here.
Book 1 of Taterskin & The Eco Defenders, “Wonders Never Cease,” can be found here.
Book 2 of Taterskin & The Eco Defenders, “Tell It To Future Generations,” can be found here.
Book 3 of Taterskin & The Eco Defenders, “Quedly Dake and His Quest to Conquer the Globe,” can be found here.
